MMA Madness, TV Style

TV - illustration from Wikipedia.org

Here comes some instant MMA madness, TV style for you.

And we apparently won't need the real life - and out there - nutty mixed martial arts fighters when we have the couch potato variety to carry the flag of splendid madness for all the world to see.

Enter this 19-year-old TV inspired MMA crazed nitwit from Phoenix, Arizona.

When he found that his girlfriend "didn't respect him" (I do wonder why...), he allegedly incorporated some MMA moves he had learned on TV to beat her up in front of her three children, before he choked her to unconsciousness.

When Snyder was interviewed by officers, he had the woman's cell phone and admitted to choking and hitting her because she was "disrespecting him," a police report said.
Snyder told officers he only meant to cause his girlfriend to lose consciousness for a "couple of seconds" and said he tried to mimic what he learned from a mixed martial arts television program, a police report said.

 No respect? That's bad ... that's really bad.

No Headbutts in Judo!

Eric Joyce - from Wikipedia.org

No ifs or buts - there are definitely no headbutts in judo!

These attacks may be allowed in a political judo fracas - although I doubt that very much. In a drunken pub brawl, on the other hand...

It appears that a British MP (Member of Parliament)  have gone gung ho, or berserk as it has also been described, in a well-known London bar reserved parliament members and their guests.

Here's what the British dailystar.co.uk has to say about the rough and tumble political action:

Former squaddie and Judo fighter Joyce, 51, faces a court hearing after he was accused of launching a vicious fight in a House of Commons bar.He allegedly yelled “This place is full of f***ing Tories” before shoving Mr Percy against a wall and headbutting Conservative MP Stuart Andrew, 40.
Joyce is also said to have punched Tory Alec Shelbrooke, 36, and MP Phil Wilson, 52 – who is one of his fellow Labour colleagues.

Can we assume that there was alcohol involved in this brawl? In any case guys, there are no headbutts in judo - political or otherwise ... even if you've had a glass or two and really hates you opponent.

Crappy "Krotty" Drivers

Car crash - Illustration from Wikipedia

Really hope we don't see any crappy "krotty" drivers trends here...

First you had the wild story of the karate (aka. krotty) parent from Ohio who drove his two young children to karate practice, while under influence ... and managed to be an hour late to boot.

Then you had another one - from Ontario, Canada this time. Karate parent late for his son's class. Windsorstar.com reports:

A 26-year-old man has been charged with careless driving. Police reports show he was late getting his son to Karate class.
The two-car collision happened just before 6 p.m. on Tuesday night.
A 2004 Chevrolet, driven by the 26-year-old man, was travelling southbound on Bernard hit a 2009 Pontiac travelling eastbound on Seminole, causing the Chevrolet to slam into the wall of Trevi Pizza.

Guys, take it easy... please. Karate and other martial arts is supposed to be fun and all that ... nothing to risk anyone's life or health over.

Judoka Disqualified

Judo randori - Illustration, Wikipedia

A Georgian judoka and Olympic champion have reportedly been disqualified after positive doping tests.

This is according to news.az.

Georgian wrestler, Olympic Champion Irakli Tsirekidze will face a three-month disqualification due to the results of the special analysis, which revealed stimulant drugs in his blood.
To avoid any inaccuracy in the tests, it was repeated with a few months interval and in both cases the analysis confirmed that Tsirekidze had a prohibited substance in his blood.

Kung Food Fight

Food fight - Illustration from Flickr.com

Don't like the way your restaurant customers treat you? Tired of getting bad reviews? Unhappy with constant complaints about your dim sum not being hot enough ... or too hot ... or too late?

If so, then it may be time to do sum' dim mak and bring your kung food fighting skills to the table.

At least - according to asiaone.com that's apparently what this chef from Malacca in Malaysia did to one of his customers.

Using kung fu moves with a pair of chopsticks and a wooden chair, a chef here floored a customer at his restaurant two years ago.Yesterday, a Sessions Court sentenced Abdul Rahman Teoh Abdullah, 47, to five years in jail for injuring P.M. Balakrishnan, 57.The offence was committed at a restaurant in Jalan Melaka Raya 11 in Taman Melaka Raya here at about 4am on Jan 1, 2010.
Kung fu moves, chopsticks and a wooden chair? Wow, that sounds like something right out of a Jackie Chan movie script.

Where's the people with a cell phone video recording when you need them?

Judoka Stealing Toothpaste?

Toothpaste - Illustration from Wikipedia

Judoka stealing toothpaste? really?

To put it mildly, this seems like a really stupid things to do when you risk losing participation in a major event like the 2012 Olympics.

It is so stupid, that I may be tempted to believe there is something else going on here than an urgent need of toothpaste. Haaretz.com reports.

Israeli judoka Soso Palelashvili was arrested Friday on suspicion of stealing toothpaste from a grocery store in Dusseldorf, Germany.
Israeli judo officials immediately decided to ban Palelashvili from competing in the Dusseldorf Judo Grand Prix, putting a serious dent in his hopes of reaching the 2012 London Olympic Games.

What's your opinion of this? Seems rather strange, right? Apparently a troublemaker, but this is strange.

Son of Rebel Leader in Trouble

U.S. Army in Liberia - Illustration photo

It appears both father and son have some issues that needs to be taken care of.

The father is a former rebel leader who is awaiting for deportation from USA to Liberia where the 62-year-old man will answer for alleged war crime charges there.

Buffalonews.com reports from Niagara Falls in New York.

The son of a former Liberian rebel leader refused a plea offer to two felonies in a domestic violence case Friday in Niagara County Court.
Mahnseah T. Boley, 32, of Hilton, decided not to plead guilty to sexual abuse and assault charges, Assistant District Attorney Lisa M. Baehre said.
Boley, a former college wrestling champion and professional mixed martial arts fighter, is the son of George E.S. Boley, who earlier this month was ordered sent back to Liberia to stand trial on war crimes charges.

Like father, like son? It may appear to be that way.

Torturer, Martial Arts Maniac

Illustration - From Flickr.com

Well, at least we've got another addition to the ever expanding Martial Arts Maniacs chronicle..

And this fellow, who's running a juvenile boot camp in China, is apparently a real nutter.

The former criminal used to run a martial arts school, and he was not exactly your regular Mr Nice or a guiding star of infinite wisdom and compassion there either, judging from the reports:

The founder of a boot camp for juveniles with behavior problems has been arrested for torturing and raping students despite charging them an annual fee of 50,000 yuan (US$7,940).
Teng Xiaohu, who runs the boot camp in Pujiang County, eastern Zhejiang Province to help youngsters get rid of Internet addiction and develop interest in study, allegedly forced three girls to offer him massage by turns every night and sexually assaulted them, local media reported.
Teng was jailed several years ago for a fight in a martial arts school and he threatened his students not to disclose his criminal past to their parents, the paper said.

Dear, oh dear, there are some really wicked individuals out there...

Used Jiu-Jitsu to Protect Sister

Honolulu - Illustration from Flickr.com

It's always great to have a big brother protecting you, as case here from Hawaii is a shining example of :-)

11-year-old Jonah Yano used his years of jiu-jitsu training - as well as his brotherly love - to help fight of an attempted carjacker in Honolulu.

The incident occurred in November 2011, according to kitv.com. Go there to read the whole story and watch the video.

Jay Yano didn't have the day after Thanksgiving off, so he planned to take his two young children towork with him. As his kids loaded into his truck, parked right outside their home in Honolulu, Yano left the vehicle running as he quickly walked to the truck's rear.
"That's when I noticed the guy walking from across the street, coming over," said Jay Yano.
Yano said within a split second, his truck began to pull forward, with his 9-year-old daughter and 11-year-old son inside. He ran to the driver's side door.
"(When) I opened the car (door), I saw my son holding the guy down with his left hand," said Yano.

Apart from the happy ending and brave actions of Yano, the case clearly shows how quickly bad things can happen.

Stab Proof? Not Quite

There is apparently a large contingent of true blood, experimental (or you could make that simply: mental) martial arts nutcases world-wide - Russia being no exception.

When most martial artists are seriously boring and predictable individuals - like yours truly - there are a group of la-la land explorers ... people who will attempt to pull off the most unpredictable stunts without missing a beat or giving it a second thought.

What can I say but thank you ... from the bottom of my intrigued and safety conscious, 9-to-5 boring, regular guy type of soul!

Police have detained a resident of Russia's Rostov region for stabbing a friend who claimed his "abs" were strong enough to stop any knife thrust, the regional Interior Ministry said in a statement on Tuesday.
The suspect told police that during a party he and a friend decided to experiment with martial arts techniques. "The owner of the home got a big kitchen knife and asked his guest to stab him in the stomach. He refused at first, saying he was afraid he would kill the host. However, the host said that in his childhood he was involved in martial arts and the knife could not penetrate his abs," the statement said.
Unfortunately, that was not the case.

"Abs-olutely" freaking awesome. This has to come up at top in any Darwin Awards ranking, right?

Also, I can't help but wonder if a decent doze of alcohol may have been a contributing factor in the proceedings?

Size, is It Really a Biggie?

You may of course have heard the expression "the bigger they are, the harder they fall"? Well, that's all fine and dandy, but what if said individual decides to land on top of you? "Master Po, help... I can't use my awesome grappling skillz!"

So to anyone who still buys into the "size doesn't matter" and "I'll just use my super ninja flip technique" ideas... Good luck! Size does come in handy from time to time.

For more martial arts humor and general mayhem - visit my Facebook page here.

Crush on Karate Teacher

Karate - illustration photo, Flickr.com

It appears that a California girl's crush on her karate teacher in 2007 resulted in the man eventually being accused of a felony and a subsequent trial by jury.

The man has now been cleared by the jury of the serious charges according to pressdemocrat.com. The man was potentially facing 9 years in prison if he had been convicted.

There is definitely no winners in a case like this, and I can't help but speculate if this is a case that should have been brought to court in the first place?

41-year-old Santa Rosa karate instructor was cleared of felony child-sex charges involving a teenage student who witnesses said developed a crush on him.
Jason Bates was accused of kissing and groping the 13-year-old girl in 2007 during classes at the Finley Community Center and at a private martial arts party at his house.

What is your take on this case - or indeed similar cases of martial arts instructors being accused of felony sexual crimes and later cleared.

Fighter Charged With Battery

Another MMA fighter - here: Alistair Overeem - with an anger management problem? Or is there more to the story than what appears in the reports, as the defense attorney indicates?

Overeem, who is 6-foot-5 and weighs more than 260 pounds, allegedly shoved a woman at about 3 a.m. local time Jan. 2, causing her to fall backward, according to Las Vegas police. He's scheduled to appear in court on Feb. 21.
"Alistair was not arrested, but was summoned to court," defense attorney David Chesnoff told the Review-Journal. "There are two sides to this story and we intend on vigorously defending this. Alistair maintains his innocence."

Alistair Overeem - picture from Wikipedia.org

What's your take on this? Do you feel that it may be too easy to judge MMA fighters prematurely simply based on the fact that they are fighters... or is it apparently that some of them do have an issue with controlling their aggression outside of the octagon/ring?

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